By Jacob Slater
Poor Mel Gibson, things just haven’t been going his way for the last couple of years. After a couple of social faux-pas, including sexually harassing a female police officer after being pulled over for a DUI, claiming that Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world and telling his wife that she should be gangraped by a pack of racial epithets, his star in the Hollywood sky has dimmed considerably. I mean, when your most notable movie film role in recent memory is from Expendendables 3, which is itself notable for being three times shittier than the original, you know shit has turned south for all intents and purposes. You’d think that if you’re the kind of person who thinks a secret cabal of Jewish folk control Hollywood, you probably don’t want to accuse their people of being the basis for world conflict if you’re interested in job security. By the way, if any secret Jewish leader in the film industry is reading this, I totally have no problem with you guys running Hollywood. So if you just happened to have a movie deal or a full scholarship to film school or something just lying around, I’d be more than willing to take it off your hands for you. I also accept cash and money orders.
Boo BHyphen: 136-39
Stone Cold Buzz-Saw Killers: 131-44
After proclaiming that he would “sock Asti in his mouth from here on out” last time we spoke to him, Kelen has done nothing of the sort. In fact, over three weeks, he lost more ground to The Buzz-Saw after picking his beloved Hurricanes to upset the still-undefeated Seminoles.
In Week 10, The Hyphen also made the inexplicable choice of choosing Texas Tech over Texas, a move that would have gained him a game on Asti. Instead, he sits 5 games back with 3 weeks to go. Kelen hasn’t spoken to the media since his infamous quote we mentioned above. Here’s an out of context tweet from The Buzz-Saw about the situation.
Safe to say, Asti is all but assured a third consecutive Golden Keg Championship.
By Jacob Slater
Despite what my writings on the T.O. and my oft-neglected film blog might imply, I actually do more than watch pro wrestling and movies. I’m more of an all-inclusive nerd, and there are many things that I spend my time on while I waste the precious hours of my life. Books, video games, theater, history, music, hardcore pornopgraphy, and as is most relevant to this article, comic books. I’ve been reading comics/graphic novels since I was 12 or so, and I’ve always been fascinated with it as a medium for creative expression and the bizarre characters brought to life within its pages. Although I wouldn’t put myself on the level of my more serious comic book fan friends (check out my bud Alec Berry’s work to see a guy who thinks about the structure of comics far more than I do) I feel like I’ve read enough of the things over the years to know what I like and what I don’t on a somewhat critical level. Especially if it’s written by Alan Moore or Grant Morrison, in which case I’ll probably read it regardless of popular opinion.
By Kelen Conley, Thomas Crawford & Anthony Sellers
Thomas Crawford: So a church is not a safe place to hide in TWD world? You’ve got to be joking. I think everyone knew that this episode was going to bring some things to a head. However, the route that it took was more then a little shocking. Continue reading
By Jacob Slater
If ever there was a man who not only defined the role of auteur director in the United States, but that of a career peaked too early, it’s Orson Welles. I mean, when your debut film is Citizen Kane, one of the most influential and well-regarded works in film history, the power of the sophomore slump becomes all too real. Not to mention being the mastermind behind the infamous War of the Worlds radio broadcast, being friends with H.G. Wells and Ernest Hemingway, and establishing himself as an A-list actor and director in one fell swoop. Which is quite the accomplishment by the way, I can’t think of many examples of great films that starred and were directed by the same person, much less on their debut movie. Aside from Yahoo Serious in the 1988 cult classic Young Einstein of course, but that goes without saying.
“The mediator between brain and the hands must be the heart.”
In my little write up of Häxan: Witchcraft Through the Ages, which you can find on my Long Dark Marathon of the Soul articles, I gave a little explanation as to my feelings on the ‘genre’ known as silent movies. As I said then, it’s not so much that I have an aversion to soundless films as that I’m not very experienced with them as a viewer. I’ve grown up in an age where the ‘talkie’ is a common thing after all, where the context of a film is gathered from the dialogue as much as it is the physical action, and it’s quite to split your attention between other things and still understand the events of the film. Watching silent films took a level of concentration that I wasn’t used to, and so in the past I haven’t been as involved mentally as more modern cinema. Now that I’m principally a ‘movie guy’ however, who is attempting to gain respect and perhaps actual legal tender from writing about films (and maybe making them, if I ever get the opportunity), I decided that it’s best for me and all you out there in internet land if I expanded my horizons as much as I can. You know, rather than try and improve my writing ability or anything like that, because that sounds hard and I’m too lazy.
Asti has now improved his lead over Kelen to 4 games. Kelen’s choice to pick the Cowboys over the Mountaineers was the cause, as WVU won their game to move to 6-2.
Kelen had this to say when we asked for a quote:
You know, I took some risks this season, hoping to catch Asti off guard. But I’ve had to learn the hard way that you can’t catch Asti off guard. You have to walk right up to him and sock him in the mouth. The question then, is how well you respond to getting your own block knocked off. So I’m looking to sock Asti in his mouth from here on out.
6 weeks remaining.