Boo B Hyphen (Mike “The Buzz-Saw” Asti): 174-48
Stone Cold Buzz-Saw Killers (Kelen “B Hyphen” Conley): 161-61
The three-peat is completed. Mike “The Buzz-Saw” Asti finished the college football regular season ahead of Kelen “B Hyphen” Conley by 13 correct picks. Kelen didn’t even bother to pick the Week 15 games. When asked why he didn’t choose winners, he said this:
Didn’t he win in Week 5?
Yes, he did Kelen. Yes he did.
By Jacob Slater
I’m in a little bit of a depressive state at the moment, so hopefully all of my faithful imaginary readers will understand that I couldn’t muster up the will to actually do a new movie write up at the moment. Major depression doesn’t mix well with Seasonal Effectiveness Disorder I suppose. Not putting out something makes me feel like more of a failure than I already do however, so I’ve decided to trot out another edition of everyone’s favorite system of structured and organized information: a list! Because if there’s one thing the internet needs more of, it’s lists. And pornographic pictures of cartoon horses, apparently.
In our inaugural episode, we preview what was then upcoming genre movies being released in March and April of 2007. And–as an added bonus–enjoy mild swearing, as this episode was not censored at the request of our radio station!
Discussed in this episode: Ghostrider, Daredevil, Bridge to Terabithia, The Abandoned, The Number 23, Joel Schumacher, Jim Carey, Zodiac, David Fincher, The Reaping, Dark Castle Entertainment, The ick moment, 300, Zack Snyder, King Kong, The Host, Godzilla, Premonition, Captivity, Hannibal Rising, Thomas Harris, Dead Silence, Rob Zombie, Ain’t It Cool News, Halloween, Remakes, The Hills Have Eyes 2, Southern Comfort, Grindhouse, The Invisible, Joss Whedon, Disturbia, Rear Window, The Island
By Jacob Slater
Or, Fox Hates Goo Snakes
Considering that Doctor Who is the longest running science fiction series in television history (starting with “An Unearthly Child” way back in 1963) and has since then spawned enough spin-offs, comics, hit singles, video games, books and films to become a full fledged multi-media franchise, you’d think that would entitle it to some sort of time-based pun for the opening line of this article. Perhaps even an intentionally bad pun, so I can pretend to be awkward and we can all revel in mocking a currently unpopular form of humor. Well I’m sorry to say that we won’t be traveling down that particular path of cliches in this particular article, mostly because I couldn’t think of a pun at the time. Rather we will be revisiting my particular path of cliches, which involves a little opening bit tangentially related to the film, perhaps dipping into some autobiographical territory, before summarizing the film and failing at cogent analysis. Much like sex with the spouse that you’ve long since lost all affection towards, it’s ultimately unfulfilling but consistent.
By Chris Slater
Professional wrestler CM Punk, real name Phil Brooks, shocked the wrestling world when he abruptly left WWE in January of this year. He gave no notice and stayed out of the public eye for months. He kept silent on the subject until Thanksgiving Day, appearing on the popular “Art Of Wrestling” podcast, hosted by veteran journeyman wrestler Colt Cabana. Both Punk and Cabana are best friends, having begun their wrestling training together in the early 2000’s.
Kelen managed to lose more ground on The Buzz-Saw by picking Utah over Arizona in Week 13, so he now trails by 6 games going into the final week of the season. Barring any games being added by Yahoo (a move that cost Kelen the Golden Keg Championship last season), Asti should be receiving his third straight Golden Keg this time next week.
The Hyphen did release a statement heading into the final week of the season.
I now know how Katherine Heigl felt in 27 Dresses.