The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – A Sports Cornucopia

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Football is back! The games actually count again! Hip hip hooray! Mike “the Buzz-Saw” Asti and George “the Howitzer” Gerbo welcome back another year of football.

The NCAA has awarded a suspension to the first freshman to win the Heisman Trophy, Johnny Manziel. No, not the full season. No, not a few games. No, not one game. Yes, the first half of a game….?! If you’re thinking what we’re thinking, you’re thinking that’s one of the most asinine things you’ve ever heard. Why was this the decision? What purpose does this slap on the wrist serve? How should the whole autograph signing mess have been handled?

Now that the offseason drama is over, it’s time to play some freakin’ games. Can Alabama be dethroned? What early season upsets may come to pass? Which team will thrive the most in their new conference?

Sticking on the gridiron, the NFL’s preseason is at its end and rosters are set. How have the AFC and NFC landscapes changed since the Ravens hoisted the Lombardi Trophy in February? Are there any sleeper squads flying under the radar? Will any 2012 darling suffer the dreaded fall from grace?

It’s mostly a celebration of football, as Mike and George pound their chests on-air. However, baseball’s far from over. And your favorite sports genius’ map out the playoff matchups, while also determining the individual hardware recipients. Is it possible Miguel Cabrera is having an even better season than his Triple Crown campaign?!

Let all those juices flow and pump your fists. Football is back to conquering the nation, just like the Howitzer and Buzz-Saw conquer sports radio, one day, at a time…

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – A Sports Cornucopia

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The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Kvetching Draft Asininity (Guests: Scott Carasik, Alex Wiederspiel, & Ethan Hammerman)

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Some celebrate Christmas, some celebrate Hanukkah, others celebrate the National Football League’s annual draft, as their most special “holiday” of the calendar year. Mike ‘the Buzz-Saw” Asti and George “the Howitzer’ Gerbo welcome the Kvetching Draftniks guys to the HBS ring. Scott Carasik, Alex Wiederspiel, and Ethan Hammerman spout, or should I say, kvetch, all the knowledge imaginable on the 2013 NFL Draft.

With the Darrelle Revis New York Jets era now officially over (sorry Alex), how does this trade impact the rest of the draft. And what is the future of Revis, now a Tampa Bay Buccaneer, as well as, the team he left behind?

Is Geno Smith truly worthy of a high draft pick, or is he benefiting from a lack of quarterback depth? Are the Minnesota Vikings and Manti Te’o headed towards a perfect marriage? Who will be the diamonds in the rough? Every draft can alter the leagues landscape for decades. For every Shannon Sharpe late round gem, there’s a Ryan Leaf or Tony Mandarich to wreck havoc on a franchise.

Apparently JaMarcus Russell has decided to put down the “purple drank” and attempt a comeback. Where does this rank on the asinine richter scale? Off the charts is a possible answer. Who are the potential overhyped 2013 class draft busts?

The Kvetching Draftniks conquer the NFL Draft, while the Howitzer and Buzz-Saw continue to conquer sports radio, one day, at a time…

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Kvetching Draft Asininity (Guests: Scott Carasik, Alex Wiederspiel, & Ethan Hammerman)

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The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – It’s A Mirage, It’s A Sabotage

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Pop some bottles and leap for joy. The Howitzer and Buzz-Saw Show celebrates its two year anniversary. Mike “the Buzz-Saw” Asti and George “the Howitzer” Gerbo have been conquering your ears for two full seasons of the HBS. Didn’t think they’d last, did ya? Well haters, you’re wrong again.

Following the fireworks, your favorite sports genius’ get back to business, sports talk (and of course explaining their asinine lives). This week we’ve got a battle of buffoonery! Pro Football Hall of Fame candidate and career Oakland Raider – Tim Brown  vs Journeyman coach and former AFC champion head coach of Brown’s Raiders – Bill Callahan. Is sabotage an acceptable term to be used for Bill’s game plan for a Super Bowl XXXVIII loss to Tampa? We enter Mike’s wheel house with another asinine conspiracy.

Now for a Super Bowl of present day. Who has the upper-hand in Super Bowl XLVII’s matchup of the San Francisco 49ers and Baltimore Ravens. “A Battle of Brothers” is the obvious headline being blasted. But what storyline is being lost? FYI: Mike is incredibly furious about this. An angry Buzz-Saw always makes for an entertaining show.

A moratorium is lifted, as Mike D’Antoni keeps outdoing himself for asininity. The guy just won’t quit acting a fool. Is he trying to get fired? Is this revenge on the Lakers for all the playoff exits while he coached the Suns? Why does he hate Pau Gasol? And more seriously, will things ever be corrected in LA? Talk radio sure hopes the answer to the last question is a big NO.

Hockey and a Manti Te’o followup will conclude this anniversary broadcast. Here’s to another two years of the Howitzer and Buzz-Saw conquering sports radio, one day, at a time…

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – It’s A Mirage, It’s A Sabotage

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Hi-jinks Or Hoax?

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WARNING: THIS IS A HOAX! The Howitzer and Buzz-Saw Show is fake. Always has been. We apologize for the confusion, as we’ve been too embarrassed to tell the truth all this time.

Sorry to burst the haters bubbles, we are not a figment of your imagination. Mike “the Buzz-Saw” Asti and George “the Howitzer” Gerbo are as real as it gets.

This week, your favorite sports genius’ try to wrap their heads around the Manti Te’o “dead” girlfriend/”Catfish”/conspiracy/hoax/WTF?! situation. Forever single George, will even receive praise for never having a made up girlfriend.

If the jokes and laughing ever stop (that’s a big if for Mike), the segments go one liar to another. While Lance Armstrong has actually met all the girls he’s dated, he hasn’t been fully honest with them, or anyone for that matter. Lance confesses his PED use to Oprah. Why do this now? Was this a wise move? How should Lance’s achievements be viewed, taking both his victory over cancer and in cycling, coupled with his web of lies.

Oh, there is actually sports news ON the field, court, and rink (it’s a miracle) to discuss?! Stop the freakin’ presses, asinine world. The NFL playoffs are down to the championship round. Which team will remain standing, following the best pro football weekend of the year? Will the Howitzer ever stop cursing his teams? The guy is like a crazed unstoppable jinxing force. Even the Buzz-saw hasn’t been able to prevent the destruction of dreams.

Wrapping things up, the NHL is days away from starting a shortened season. Mike is still concerned for the product he may see on the ice. Regardless, hockey’s back and no one can really complain about that.

The HBS - the best damn non-hoax sports talk show around. Conquering sports radio, one day and hoax, at a time…

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Hi-jinks Or Hoax?

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Reeling In The Bait

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Just when you think the asininity is calming down, it pulls you back in! This week, Mike “the Buzz-Saw” Asti and George “the Howitzer” Gerbo reel in asininity and mount it for all to see.

Your favorite sports geniuses start things off by putting a bow on the college football season and the BCS National Championship Game. Has Nick Saban become the greatest college football coach of all-time after his 4th title? How much longer can the Alabama dynasty continue? Where will Notre Dame go from here? If Chip Kelly leaves for the NFL’s Eagles, can the Irish keep up their renaissance?

Hockey has returned! NHL hockey (the only real kind) that is. So the Lockout is over. That means an end to NHL asinine ways, right? Not so fast… In fact we’re already in a state of normalcy again. Luongo is on the trade block, elite teams are without captains, the Maple Leafs make no sense and act a fool, and chaos abounds for a shortened season. Get excited (eye roll)….!

The hardwood won’t be ignored, as Carmelo Anthony and Kevin Garnett engage in a war of words that leads all fans crossing their fingers for a future MMA style cage match? I got my money on the older KG. He clearly can get in Melo’s head.

Another week of NFL playoff action is here. It’s the Divisional Round. Who will remain once the dust is settled on chapter 2 in the NFL post-season? Before giving their picks, some drama needs discussed from Wild Card Weekend. We’re looking at you, Redskins.

What does the Howitzer and Buzz-Saw Show do better than the rest? If you don’t know now, you’re just an idiot. The HBS conquers sports radio, one day, at a time….

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Reeling In The Bait

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – An Asinine New Year!

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It’s a new year, yet the HBS is still here! Mike “the Buzz-Saw” Asti and George “the Howitzer” Gerbo say goodbye to 2012 and welcome in An Asinine New Year – 2013. While 2012 set a pretty high bar for asininity in the sports world, 2013 is already getting to work.

Arguably the worst college football bowl season in recent memory continues. What is to blame for these lack luster games and matchups? Will the remaining BCS contests and National Championship Game save this miserable post-season?

With the NFL regualr season now over, it’s time to look ahead to the playoffs. Before that can be done, some important businees needs taken care of. Mike’s 2012 HBS NFL Pick’em championship banner raising ceremony will take place. Once the champagne is popped and the fireworks are finished, Mike and George will give their Wild Card Round picks and even attempt to place the proper blame on the teams that just missed the cut, what their futures will hold, and where the fired head coaches may end up.

After all the football talk, there are some signs for optimism in the NHL labor negociations. The owners and NHL Players Association are actually talking! Not to sound like a bimbo pre-teen female, but OMG! OMG! What does this mean? Will the season be saved? Or is the Buzz-Saw’s hell, fire, and brimstone reality going to come crashing down on the Howitzer’s thoughts of butterflies, rainbows, and a return of hockey?

FYI: Mike still plans to be an unbearable, arrogant, witty, sarcastic prick in 2013. Sorry, if you weren’t a fan before, you will remain displeased. Hey, at least George will be around put him in check (if that’s possible). They conquered 2012 and now embark on a journey of conquering 2013′s sports radio, one day at a time….

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – An Asinine New Year!

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Victims Of Self Destruction

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Back from their two week hiatus, Mike “the Buzz-Saw” Asti and George “the Howitzer” Gerbo are ready to explode with pent up aggression built up on the sports world. A lot has happened since the last time you heard from your favorite sports genius’. Your ears can end their depression. The Howitzer and Buzz-Saw Show has returned!

As usual and much to the Howitzer’s dismay, another Buzz-Saw prediction came true. Notre Dame finished undefeated and is in the National Championship Game. The Irish will square off with Alabama for the title. Who will take home the crown and did Alabama crawling out of the Georgia game give the Notre Dame faithful some hope? Outside of the championship, the rest of the BCS isn’t exactly filled with instant classics and intrigue. Northern Illinois crashed the party. Was NIU truly deserving of a BCS honor? Mike and George go over the college football bowl picture and give their Heisman votes. Why doesn’t George just listen to Mike? He’s always right!

The sport with the busiest off-season is in the midst of meetings to deal with the future, while a dark cloud keeps the past a focus. There’s been some player movement, yes. But that goes on the back burner, as Mike covers the most controversial ballot in Hall of Fame history.

As directed by the one and only Kobe Bryant, Mike and George “put on their big boy pants” and tackle the soap opera that is the Los Angeles Lakers season. Will Mike D’Antoni ever mature? Can Pau “Mr. Sensitive” Gasol fit in this system? Can Kobe be interviewed without scowling at every reporter? God, we hope not. This asinine team is just too much fun to watch implode.

We left. We came back. Mike still hates everyone. And the Howitzer and Buzz-Saw Show still conquers sports radio, one day, at a time….

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Victims Of Self Destruction

Trike House Party – Week Thirteen: Hyphen Goes 6-4; The Buzz-Saw Leads By 9 Games

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Leaderboard
Asti 87-32 (Last week: 4-6)
Conley 78-41 (Last week: 6-4)
Gerbo 77-41 (Last week: 4-6)
Sellers 76-43 (Last week: 4-6)

Week Twelve Results:
UCF 21 Tulsa 23
(22)Rutgers 10 Cincinnati 3
(18)USC 28 (17)UCLA 38
Ohio St. 21 Wisconsin 14
NC State 48 (11)Clemson 62
(23)Texas Tech 21 (24)Oklahoma St. 59
Utah St. 48 (20)Louisiana Tech 41
(12)Oklahoma 50 WVU 49
(1)Kansas St. 24 Baylor 52
(13)Stanford 17 (2)Oregon 14

The Games
Ohio @ (23)Kent St.
Arizona St. @ (24)Arizona
(19)Michigan @ Ohio St.
(5)Oregon @ (15)Oregon St.
(21)Oklahoma St. @ (13)Oklahoma
(4)Florida @ (10)Florida St.
(8)Stanford @ (17)UCLA
(12)South Carolina @ (11)Clemson
(1)Notre Dame @ USC
Louisiana Tech @ San Jose St.

Asti
Kent State
Arizona
Ohio State
Oregon
Oklahoma
Florida State
Stanford
South Carolina
Notre Dame
Louisiana Tech

Conley
Kent St.
Arizona
Ohio St.
Oregon
Oklahoma St.
Florida
UCLA
South Carolina
USC
San Jose St.

Gerbo
Kent State
Arizona
Ohio State
Oregon
Oklahoma
Florida State
Stanford
South Carolina
Notre Dame
San Jose St.
And because I hate that stupid LA Tech/SJSU game (even if they are both 9-2), I’m also picking WVU to lose to Iowa State and UVA to beat Virginia Tech on the road. Also Wisconsin beats Penn State, cause I’m feeling generous.

Sellers
Kent St.
Arizona
Ohio St.
Oregon
Oklahoma
Florida
Stanford
South Carolina
ND
LA Tech

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Cracking Jaws & Taking Names! (Guest: Jess Stiver)

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Thanks to the farmers, it is now pitch black outside midway through the day. The hour gained on the clock is lost in annoyance. At least it means we are moving through the sports calendar. With the college football season nearing an end, Mike “the Buzz-Saw” Asti and George “the Howitzer” Gerbo are joined by Jess Stiver, owner of the “Land Thieves” blog. Stiver will discuss which teams have the inside track on the BCS and who will end up vying for the National Championship. His precious Oklahoma Sooners won’t be left out, as the resident HBS sports genius’ hope to persuade his squad to take it easy on their spiraling Mountaineers.

Following the interview, the real program gets underway! When we last heard from the Howitzer and Buzz-Saw they were busy dissecting the asininity that was the Lakers freakout session. After firing Mike Brown only 5 games into the season, can the darling franchise find it’s mojo again? Was rejecting a third Phil Jackson stint for Mike D’Antoni the right decision? Expect tons of eye rolling and loud noises, as the Buzz-Saw tends to be easily agitated.

Turn on the stove and watch the crock-pot simmer. The Major League Baseball offseason is already heating up! Clinching the title of most asinine organization in sports today, the Miami Marlins completely dismantled the Hispanic vibe they assembled, shipping their stars to the Blue Jays. Where do the Marlins go from here? Despite owning two World Series crowns, how bad are things down in Little Havana? On the flip side of the blockbuster trade, does the new additions make Toronto a contender in the always brutal AL East? While some are planning for 2013, others are receiving 2012 hardware. Did the voters get it right with the ROY, Cy Young’s, and MVP selections? Listen to Mike, he knows best.

Let’s toast to the Howitzer and Buzz-Saw, the unanimous MVP’s! Hear them conquer sports radio, one day, at a time….

The Howitzer & Buzz-Saw Show – Cracking Jaws & Taking Names! (Guest: Jess Stiver)

Trike House Party – Week Eleven: Boise St. & WVU Spoil It For The Buzz-Saw

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Leaderboard
Asti 75-24(Last week: 8-2)
Sellers 68-31 (Last week: 7-3)
Gerbo 65-33 (Last week: 6-4)
Conley 63-36 (Last week: 7-3)

Week Ten Results:
Virginia Tech 12 Miami 30
(12)Oklahoma 35 Iowa St. 20
(16)Texas A&M 38 (15)Mississippi St. 13
TCU 39 (21)WVU 38
Mississippi 10 (6)Georgia 37
(23)Texas 31 (18)Texas Tech 22
(4)Oregon 62 (17)USC 51
(24)Oklahoma St. 30 (2)Kansas St. 44
(1)Alabama 21 (5)LSU 17
San Diego St. 21 (19)Boise St. 19

The Games
(24)Northwestern @ Michigan
Wake Forest @ NC State
(11)Oregon St. @ (14)Stanford
Penn St. @ (16)Nebraska
WVU @ Oklahoma St.
(15)Texas A&M @ (1)Alabama
(2)Kansas St. @ TCU
Vanderbilt @ Mississippi
(21) Mississippi St. (7)LSU
(4)Notre Dame @ Boston College

Asti
Michigan
North Carolina State
Stanford
Nebraska
WVU (West Virginia goes from dreaming Heisman and National Championship, to now having to scratch and claw for even a DAMN BOWL GAME AT ALL!)
Alabama
Kansas State (I’m tempted to go TCU with Klein being hurt and facing the only worthy Big 12 defense)
Vanderbilt
LSU
Notre Dame (The team of destiny stays alive)

Sellers
Northwestern
NC State
Oregon St. (this is one of my gamble’s to try and gain ground on Asti!)
Nebraska
WVU (as much faith I’ve lost, I can’t pick against my my school.)
Bama
TCU (taking the route Asti is tempted to walk but won’t.)
Mississippi
LSU
Notre Dame

Gerbo
Michigan
NC State (why the hell are we ALWAYS picking Wake Forest games?!)
Stanford
Nebraska
Oklahoma State (could WVU miss even a bowl appearance? still possible)
Alabama
Kansas State
Ole Miss
LSU
Notre Dame

Conley
Michigan
NC State
Stanford
Nebraska
Oklahoma St.
Alabama
Kansas St.
Vanderbilt
LSU
Notre Dame